Great Book Review

Kids, Parents and Power Struggles

...by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka

Review by Heather Leffler, mother of 8-year-old

This is my all time favorite parenting book! It has even helped me be more effective with some of the adults I work with! The author describes how to be an "emotion coach" to your child, to teach her to work with you and to cope with her own strong emotions.

The chapter entitled "What Fuels Power Struggles: Identifying the Real Feeling and Needs" was especially useful to me. It helped me learn more about my own style as well as my child's and illuminated some of the issues causing our power struggles. For example, we are both "highly persistent" people. We don't like to stop what we are doing before we have completed the task. I would be trying to get my daughter to school on time and she would be trying to finish whatever game she was playing. It is very hard to get her to switch tasks. I have more patience now and am more willing to give five minute warnings and allow her to finish one more page before she stops. I also gained useful insight from the author's explanation of the differences between introverts and extroverts and tips on how to get them working together. Sections on analytical versus emotional decision making and quizzes throughout the book help you identify where you and your child are on the spectrum.

The Beth Ladino Family Resource Library offers a wealth of resources on a wide range of topics pertaining to family life. It is free and open to the public. Stop by Tuesday – Friday from 9:00 – 1:00. Can’t make it during those hours? Call us – we frequently accommodate after-hours users.